Best Door to Door Salesman Ever

You can pay cash, check, chicken wings...:)

Angleški podnapisi:

I’m gonna be quick like Nestle and Beat It like Michael Jackson that’s why your neighbours say I remind them of Nicholas Cage cos I’m gone in 60 seconds.

Who does this the most on a dirty window? The kids, the dogs that are ugly black guys who eat fried chicken.

You see these water spots? Look! They get whiter than my elbows without lotion.

Stevie Wonder said Seeing is Believing and I got a disease called Enthusiasm so I’m gonna cut straight to the mustard.

Don’t laugh too hard cos the neighbours are gonna see this black kid rubbing the window.

No waterspots, no fingerprints, no streaks – that’s why we can’t sell it to criminals. Don’t tell OJ or Tiger Woods ok?

My Mum said if it’s darker than me and don’t pay the bills it shouldn’t be there right?

This right here, We just upgrade it like Beyonce.

You know what HBO means? You get to Help a Brother Out.

I’ve been on a roll like toilet paper.

Scrubbing the floor you just go back and forth like an argument. Now I ain’t Jesus, but look how I did that like Moses split the Red Sea. Paint me green and call me a pickle.

That one bottle lasts longer than my last relationship.

This is my last demo, then I’m outta your hair quicker than your favourite shampoo.

Even though I’m black it ain’t black magic it just work.

Would you throw it out, shout it out, get OJ to stab it out, Mike Tyson to bite it out…(cut off by lady)

You know you can’t put bleach on colours right? Look at this sprays bottle on face this safe on colours.

Would you say that’s whiter than a colgate smile.

What’s the hardest thing to clean? Would it be the carpet, the tile, the barbeque grill, the shower doors, the oil that’s on the driveway that’s blacker than my mother but not as beautiful?

“What are you selling?” Personality.

taps unopened bottle Unlike Madonna it’s never been touched.

But whatchall do for a living? You must be in sales too, huh? I know, cos your house is bigger than my whole neighbourhood.

My mum said if you can’t get the whole chicken at least get the wing right?

But you should just save my autograph because by the time you run out you’ll probably see me on Last Comic Standing and then you gotta Ebay it to get your money back.

You sharper than Gillette.

You must be a teacher. Cos you got a lotta class.

(Referring to door handle) you see this look shiny like a baby hiney.

Remember when I told you it couldn’t fade colour? That’s why we couldn’t sell it to Michael Jackson.

Are you from around here? I’m from my mother but don’t tell my daddy he’s a

Y’all cooler than the other side of the pillow.

Dang if I had your hands, I’d cut mine off. Cos your neighbours have been working me like I’m black and paying me like a mexican.

Just trial one cos I know that ain’t gotta take the cheese outta your macaroni.

You can do cash, cheques or chicken wings.

I cannot decide who made my day, Kenny Brooks or you! :D

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